PERFORMANCE

Superior Swamp Cooler Performance (feat. napkins)

Industrial swamp coolers are luxury tools for hard work addicts. Basically, if you work in a big factory, warehouse, auto shop, machine place, circus or indoor batting cage, you could use a portable swamp cooler to keep your employees or guests happy. Cooling over 2,500 sq. ft. isn’t easy, so we drew some stuff on napkins to help illustrate our point.

First, we drew a triangle on a napkin before realizing you probably work in a rectangle. So we fixed it. Don’t judge.

Your building on a napkin

That square is where you work. Keep in mind it’s not actually where you work. It’s just a drawing on a napkin. Now, these photo-realistic napkin renderings show door placements and different configurations for Cool Boss placement. Multiple units are depicted to increase the cooling potential of your space. Remember, the oscillating swing-louvers on our swamp cooler make it easy to throw air all over town.

Oscillating swing-louvers on the Cool Boss swamp cooler make it easy to install more than one

Your square footage is probably different, however, unless you live on a 2D napkin surface. Which is actually pretty cool. Probably gets lonely, though.

Wish I didn't live in a napkin

What you don’t see in our soon-to-be-award-winning art is something we can’t really show: how little maintenance you’re ever going to do. Like, ever. We’ll try anyway.

Not doing maintenance

Cool Boss is almost too easy to maintain. You’ll need to replace the evaporative media from time to time, but that’s about it. The beauty of simplicity is that simple is beautiful, and our beautiful swamp coolers are really simple. That is, our simple swamp coolers are beautiful. And they have great personalities.

P.S. About those napkin drawings. It was a slow day at work. We hadn’t launched the website yet. We had to make it look like we were working. Boss’s orders. He wasn’t being cool.

P.P.S. We launched the site and don’t have slow days anymore. Direct result of napkin intervention.

P.P.P.S. Many napkins were decimated in the making of this page. Our sincere apologies to the trees.